18 is the new 15.....

So I work a couple shifts a week at a local restaurant. I don't know if most people know this, but servers only make $2.13 an hour plus tips. So yesterday evening, I wait on a table of 6 and they were all polite but high maintenance. When it came to the end of the meal the bill was $85, the older gentleman wanted to pay. I took his payment and when he gave me the slip I looked at the tip entered on the slip, it was $6! Are you fucking kidding me?! Really? You're that cheap of a person, that you're willing to spend $85 on your family to eat, but when it comes to tipping the server who did everything, you might as well just of told me to fuck off because it wasn't worth it to pay me the 20% that I busted my ass for in taking care of you and your family. Then the rest of the night was spent alright, with everyone else giving me 20% on their tickets. Then towards the end of my  shift, I get a family of 5 who all want desserts, so fine. I get all the desserts ran my ass off, making them specialty drinks, getting refills, etc. By the time the got the bill it was $48. After they paid, I got a $3 tip! I'm telling you.... All these people who don't know how to tip need to just stay home and cook themselves. So todays words of wisdom.... Take care of ALL the people who service you, you never know when they'll cut your hair wrong, drop your food on the floor, etc. Have a blessed day....

Silly Ol' Bear.......

So this week was Shane and my anniversary! Needless to say it was very uneventful. I'm hoping that we can do something nice soon for it, considering I had to work. But last Sun, I got pulled over for doing 44 in a 25! First off I was aware I was going a bit over the speed limit, but come on! This was also taking place at 11:20 in the evening, no one was out, I had just finished working a 16-hour shift. The street that I was on has 2 different speed limit signs posted on the street. However, there were no signs to indicate when the speed changed until right before you turn the corner to go onto a different street which that speed limit is 45. First off, I did see my speedometer and I was going 40, not 44! Secondly, just this past week (Tue) I believe I saw new signs being put up from the point where I saw the sign last. This irks me slightly, because it seems to me that when you have to cities located within 15 mins of each other, one seems to be more strict than the other. Like take for example, in Omaha (my city of residence), most of the police there will pull you over for major things. But in matters of a trivial matter, i.e blinker not being used, etc. they really don't care for the most part because they are dealing with much bigger fish, than lil old small traffic issues. But yet in the small city of Bellevue, which is about 20 mins away from where in Omaha I live, it seems like the police there are more bored; so of course naturally, they want to pull you over for every little thing that you did wrong. Now, this is the first speeding ticket I've had in over 5 years. I'm less than amused. But now because of this cop who had nothing better to do than pull me over, question me on where I was headed to (which I responded "home"), where I was coming from (which I responded 16-hour shift from work), where I worked at, which site I worked at. Really? This has pertinence on me getting a ticket because why? Do I look that suspicious because of the color of my skin? Or for the simple fact that you have nothing else better to do than park yourself in a parking lot of a closed business to set up your trap to meet your quota?
     Now onto something that has come to light, well, been shining in  the light for a very long time. I've known all my life that I'm very intelligent. Always was the scholar who barely had to study for exams because everything came naturally to me. But as it turns out, when it comes to matters of common sense and remembering common daily-to-do's; I seem to be a very forgetful person. Case in point Owl, from the Winnie the Pooh stories; very intelligent and wise is he, but always seems to be forgetting the simple things. Now, most everyone in my life has never seemed to be bothered by this, but now it seems to be affecting my marriage. My husband, seems to be annoyed at his wits end with the fact that when most people remember certain things I seem to forget. Take for example, my Driver's License; since I started a job where it seems like the people I work with will go into my purse and steal things, I decided to stop carrying my purse. The potential problem with this is I don't always remember to take my id out of my worn pants/shorts and place it on the table so I remember to take it with me the next day. But it's not just that one thing, there's been occasions where I've taken items home with me because I've forgotten they were in my pockets. I remember when my mother used to be so mad at me because I forgot to clear out my pockets before they went into the wash. It's not that I don't want to remember, it just seems like even when I set myself out with the focus to remember home routines every now and then I'll forget, and it'll put my husband in a foul mood because he constantly feels like he has to remind me. It seems like this is turning into a parent-child relationship, which is making neither of us happy. Primarily because in a marriage we should both have partners we can trust who will be responsible; ones we know that if we have children, if we're at work, we know that the children will be fed, the house will be taken care of (not burned down!). I just don't know what to do. I'm also at my wits end because I feel like the child in the relationship. I'm tired of his constant reminders if I have this or that, no I don't have anything else besides x things in my pockets. If I put the trash in the bathroom so our "furry" children don't get into it, etc. I just wish that I could flip a switch and it would all be better. Maybe I write myself little post-its to constantly remind myself of the things? Or write it all on a piece of paper (i.e. schedule of days- i.e. what day of what week I do what... etc) All I know is, the sooner this improves, the sooner our relationship doesn't feel so strained...... Have a blessed day!
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. - Mark Twain

The great hunt for my ideal body....

So today, this girl I went to high school with is with a group of her girlfriends in Vegas. Lately Shane has been getting into super shape and he looks so hot! But as much as I'm proud of him, I feel like somehow I'm getting left behind in the dust. And as I'm checking on my FB, I notice the pics she's posting.... A good probably 90% of them are poolside, these people are all looking hot and sexy... Ya know, they are what I like to call the "beautiful" people. Anyways, I have to say that even though I've been losing weight, by doing nothing! Which I find funny, because I don't usually lose from doing nothing, in fact, it's gone the opposite direction usually! Well with the weather getting nicer and hotter, is just making me want what all these "beautiful" people have. The funny thing I don't wanna be rail thin, but I would like to have somewhat nice body to show off a little. Does anyone else feel the same? I know that by getting my weight into the 160's is an accomplishment within itself from where I've been, but I'm still at about 30 lbs from where I wanna be. I'm hoping with this new schedule of moving to residential, where I only work on the weekends and one weekday between school, I can get some exercise in and get a, little healthier and see some improvement in myself that I can take some awesome pics with me in a 2 piece. All I know is with as close as I am to this small loss to finally getting where I want. So here's to stepping in the right direction and here's me hitting it and getting into my two piece!

All I can do is keep moving on.....

When I was a kid, I remember having a vast imagination. I would play in the backyard pretending I was at a really exotic zoo, other times I was hosting a neighborhood carnival. There was nothing I felt would hold me back. But as I grew, so did my aspirations. When I hit 18, the world was my oyster; nothing was outside my grasp. But I notice as I'm winding down to the last quarter of my school, the more apprehensive I'm becoming about having a career. But it's not even just school, the job I'm in now seems to drone on even though there are times when the job is good and I enjoy it. But yet I feel like there is more to life than this. Everyday people are always striving it seems to be the best they can be all the while trying to make the most amount of money to make life easier. Part of this I get... Nothing I would love more than to work a simple 40 hours and be able to contribute comfortably so that my family can have a nice life. So here comes the next question, since we plan on moving to Vegas in November do I: a) quit this job and take a job that makes more money which I could easily transition to once we move? Or do I stay at this place which guarantees stability until I leave and just start anew once we move? The questions that help us to stay or go. I often think that if I am offered the job I just may take it, because I'm looking into the long run of the situation. Either way, I'm so looking to the future as that long distant past little girl with ambitions only as deep as her imagination would limit her... Which for me was none. Have a blessed day...

Destiny Unraveled

Let  me start off by saying welcome to my blog. We will be embarking on a journey together through which together we will become who we were destined to become. I hope to write about various things from my day-to-day living, special occasions, things that anger me, make me laugh, make me cry. I want to write these things all without judgment from you my faithful readers. The reason I'm being is an open book, is because if in some way it will help you with whatever you're struggling with or questioning. Now that I've told you what my blog's about, here comes the fun part: blogging! I guess the easiest thing to start with is telling you about myself. So here it goes: On a blustery Tuesday in November 8th, 1977, a baby girl was born to a mother and father. That girl is yours truly! I grew up in a low middle class neighborhood, with 2 younger sisters. I was a very introverted child. When I turned 5, I was enrolled in private school that my grandmother paid for. Needless to say being a bi-racial child (read: mexican & white) made for an interesting school life with more upper middle class brats & girls I hated, who were mean and teased yours truly on a daily basis. It was there I also became best friends with one girl who moved away after 4th grade, and one boy who left the school after 3rd grade. After that I was alone until middle of 7th grade year, when my parents had split up and my sisters and I were moved to public schools. WOW! This had really opened up my eyes. There were all kinds of races there, everyone seemed to fit in with some group, somewhere. There were no loners here. Needless to say, made alot of acquaintances there. Then my parents reconciled and now they'll be celebrating 34 yrs of marriage in July. Ended up going to Bryan Senior High School, made a few formidable friendships, one which I still talk to her every few months or so. Graduated May 1996. Met my future at the husband in September of that year. Went through many trials and tribulations in that relationship (I may reveal in another blog). For 11 years we were off and on, still all counts though! In 2007, in a civil service were married by a Judge who said he has a record of no divorces of the couples he's married. Guess we were fortunate, even though there are times I'd like to wring his neck and vice versa HA! With emotions and tempers flaring high, it's something we both couldn't handle very well. We separated in 2010 for 6 months, time served us well. Both rediscovered ourselves and realized this was the very core of what marriage truly is. We reconciled, and have been going strong so far. In fact married 4 years the 21st. We plan on moving to Nevada this year, and we're both excited for a new start in our lives. Currently, I'm working full-time and going to school full-time, which is a full plate for us both. No matter though soon enough we'll be able to rebuild into our relationship with everything that's being depleted because of no quality time. We hope to start a family next year. I guess that's me in a nutshell for now. Now you know a little about me. Nice to meet you. See you next time. Have a blessed day!






Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. - Mark Twain